Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Anxiety of Leaving


Rebecca and I are six days away from the most amazing experience of our lives thus far. We will be going to Alicante, Spain to study Spanish with other American students. She will be with me for June and then in July I will stay and she will be returning to Vegas. So many mixed emotions are running through me I feel like a marathon is being held inside my head.


First off, I'm excited. I can't wait. Everytime something new has been thrown at me in the past few months, my only thought has been: I just want to get out of here!


Second off, I'm scared out of my mind. My Spanish is not great, I will know one person and I am going to try my best not to cling to her no matter how much I love Rebecca, plus she is leaving me in July to be on my own. I don't know what to expect, and I still feel like I'm not ready.


Lastly, I'm apprehensive. What the heck am I doing?? I'm going off the advice of Avi, a well known author, but I am putting all my trust in him, believing that this is something I need to do.


So, to calm myself, I am going off the words of Avi himself:

"...if it's going to be tomorrow, it might as well be today. And if it is today, it could have been yesterday. If it was yesterday, then you're over and done with it, and can write your own book. Think about that." -Avi


Today has come for me, and before I know it it will be yesterday, and then some yesterday from now I will be able to write my own book.


2 comments:

Marion said...

You rock on, girl! You're going to do fine, and I can't wait to read the book you will write after this most awesome adventure!!

Your No. 1 Fan, Ma

mqzoeller said...

Going off the advice of your favorite author, eh? I was under the impression that you were just inspired completely by the wisdom and general awesomeness of your high school Spanish teacher, who has also told you many really cool quotable lines like,

"If yesterday already happened... and, and, tomorrow hasn't, but Paul McCartney only wrote a song about one of them and it's not going to be about tomorrow because other that would mean that Paul McCartney knows the future, which I wouldn't be surprised really because he has all that Beatle money but I just don't think they had the technology for that at the time. Maybe now, with everything scientists have been working on, like I saw this one thing about monkeys on t.v... Hey did I ever mention that you should go to Spain?"

But I guess if that's not why then the Avi thing is good too.

Your Spanish is too that good. You were amongst the top of the class so give me any of that business. Of course you won't understand a thing at first but you'll know most of the words, it'll just take time to hear how they are pronouncing them. Also, right now is one of the few times in your academic career when you can go out at night or go to the beach and still claim to be studying, because a huge part of your reason to be there is to develop conversation skills, so boom.

You will rule that city: I have already warned them.

-Zoeller