Monday, May 21, 2007

Adios Amigos



It's Monday morning and I am just a day away from my flight out. I go from Vegas to LA, LA to Paris, and Paris to Madrid. I will spend three days touring Madrid before going down to Alicante for school. The nervousness is gone and has been replaced by something new. I'm ready. I'm excited. I am going to take the world by storm. I have been given the opportunity to do something, to go somewhere, and have an experience of a lifetime. This is not a time to be scared. I'm at a point in my life where everything is new and different and I can make my life whatever I want it to be. I have a choice to stay and a choice to go out into the world and see what is there. I'm choosing the latter. I think sometimes people are too afraid to make decisions like that. They are too afraid to step out onto the limb because of the risk of the fall. They avoid the fall rather than see the view. A lot of times one doesn't realize the capacity that they truly have to experience something immense, so as a result they sit back and watch everyone else live their lives. I don't want that for myself. I won't settle for ordinary when I can have extraordinary.

"Be prepared to accept the consequences of your dreams"

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Anxiety of Leaving


Rebecca and I are six days away from the most amazing experience of our lives thus far. We will be going to Alicante, Spain to study Spanish with other American students. She will be with me for June and then in July I will stay and she will be returning to Vegas. So many mixed emotions are running through me I feel like a marathon is being held inside my head.


First off, I'm excited. I can't wait. Everytime something new has been thrown at me in the past few months, my only thought has been: I just want to get out of here!


Second off, I'm scared out of my mind. My Spanish is not great, I will know one person and I am going to try my best not to cling to her no matter how much I love Rebecca, plus she is leaving me in July to be on my own. I don't know what to expect, and I still feel like I'm not ready.


Lastly, I'm apprehensive. What the heck am I doing?? I'm going off the advice of Avi, a well known author, but I am putting all my trust in him, believing that this is something I need to do.


So, to calm myself, I am going off the words of Avi himself:

"...if it's going to be tomorrow, it might as well be today. And if it is today, it could have been yesterday. If it was yesterday, then you're over and done with it, and can write your own book. Think about that." -Avi


Today has come for me, and before I know it it will be yesterday, and then some yesterday from now I will be able to write my own book.